Permission to shine

Angela Fusaro
December 5, 2016

Career Coaching for Mums

The company where I work is organizing a Christmas party on the 9th December.

As many other companies?Christmas parties, there is going to be a specific theme for the night.? In our case the theme is Black and Gold, quite common for parties taking place during the festive season of the year.

I was thinking of a dress to wear for this special occasion, something not to complicated, considering I have little time for shopping in this period.

As many of you probably, I?ve got some black dresses in my wardrobe and I could combine them with some golden accessories so it should all get sorted easily.

A couple of days ago, though, a good friend of mine, who works at a little store of vintage clothes in the centre of Amsterdam, posted on Facebook a photo of some golden dresses that arrived at her shop.

Well, that photo really drew my attention and made me think, why not? Why not to try one of those for the party? So, last weekend I visited my friend?at the shop and in less than an hour I found the perfect dress. When I was saying good-bye to my friend and thanking her, she said ?My pleasure, I really enjoyed seeing you shine?. ?

Many of us, me included, often like to play safe. In most cases, we don?t even realise it as this the normal way for us.

But, sometimes, I believe that a dose of daring, as well as a bit of spark in our life, is much needed. To challenge ourselves and stay open to something new.

Habits and preferences are important, of course, but trying something new can help us discover something we didn?t know before. It helps us feel different about ourselves, behave in a different way and even think different thoughts.

Let?s take the example of an outfit for the office. Think about the difference in your day when you wear your old jeans and a sweater compared to when you wear a skirt or a nice pair of pants with a blouse and maybe shoes with a bit of high heels. I must say the second outfit makes me feel and behave in a more confident and assertive way. Of course, everything concerning taste is very personal here.

Said so, I don?t think we need to go too far from what we are, from our beliefs and preferences.

I would never transform my look completely from a day to another or go for something too extreme like colouring my hair blond (they are naturally dark) or start a career in finance (numbers are not really my thing). If like me, you also would like to welcome some little changes, play bigger and dare more in your life, here are some tips to help you:

  • Start small. For example, choose a different outfit only for one day a week; or dye your hair with a non-permanent color; or give a presentation to your team before going to costumers or the board;

  • Be your friend. When you are in the new situation, new outfit, hair color or new assignment at work, look at yourself with the eyes of your best friend, please be kind.

  • Celebrate or accept that is still ok. If you like how you feel in the new situation, enjoy it! If not, that?s ok too. Maybe is there anything you learned from the experience? Any experience can give us precious insights on ourselves and the world around us.

  • Smile. A new outfit, look or a new task at work can bring some spark in our days but remember that the best way to really shine is simply to smile!

Love Angela

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